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I AM STRUGGLING WITH ISOLATION



It's a Sunday evening and I am laying in the same spot that I have been in for around 7 hours. I have had no motivation today, the same as yesterday and the day before. For years, I told myself and everyone around me that I was an introvert. An introvert who would take staying in over going out any day of the week and to be honest, that is still true. Except now, just like many other's in the world, freedom has been taken away from me and I desperately need it back, now, more than ever.

It is a scary time for everyone right now and my heart goes out to those families who have been and will be effected by Covid-19. It's still hard to get my head around the history that we are witnessing at this very moment but it has hit me harder than I ever expected. I was dreading watching the news on that Monday when we were told that it was a lockdown! It was speculating all over twitter and although I knew it was probably true, I really didn't want to believe it.

I know what the UK is doing is the right thing (please stick to the rules) but that doesn't mean it isn't taking it's toll on people's mental health. Like I said above, I am really struggling to find motivation to even get up out of bed on some days. I just think "What is the point?" - It's not like we have to go anywhere and what's the point in getting up and dressed if we're not leaving the house?

Don't get me wrong,  I am keeping myself busy, working, creating content but I always seem to hit a wall where I get really fatigued, fed up, frustrated and that's when I feel like giving up. Because I work from home anyways, this is nothing new to me when it comes to day to day work routine but not being able to break up my day by going out to eat, to see friend's, cinema etc is really starting to get me down. I do go out on walk's and I really recommend you do that as often as possible (if you can) but I am seriously needing a hug from my best friend's and family.


I genuinely believe that we have got over the biggest hurdle in our lockdown and that it won't be too long until we're allowed to see other people that live outside our house. That is what I am holding onto, the fact that we've got over the worst of it and we will soon be able to break free. Please continue to stay in your house's though and only leave for your daily exercise and for essential's. I get so angry and equally frustrated when I see people breaking the rules, meeting their friend's and swapping house's. It is difficult, I know.. but I am not sat at home, battling with my mental health every day for people to act like a pandemic isn't going on outside their home's. The sooner everyone listen's to the rules, the quicker we will be out of lockdown.

Another thing I am holding on to, is the image in my head of me on holiday, the sun is setting and I have my hair in a bun, glowy skin and MAC'S Red Chilli on my lips. I am wearing my gold hoops, gold rings and gold bracelets, sitting down, having dinner on the beach front with a glass of wine in one hand and ~ some sort of ~ flat bread in the other. I have Victoria Secret's Vanilla spray on my neck and wrist's and a flowy dress that hide's away my food baby. It'll all be over soon and when it is, I will make that dream of mine come true.

So, if like me, you are struggling with quarantine, I just want to say that I am with you, I am here for you and we will get through this. To those of you who have lost loved one's due to the Corona Virus, my heart goes out to you and I am sending you nothing but love, light and prayer's.

Lot's of love & Stay Safe x


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